The Roads Not Taken

Robert Frost once wrote in his poem “The Road Not Taken” the following lines:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.

Often cited as a poem recognizing the importance of anti-conformity, this poem more importantly signifies how one’s entire life path can seemingly be shaped by a simple decision.

In the case of my life, I think many events had to ultimately transpire for me to end up where I am at now. And so, for the sake of telling a complete picture, let’s see what would have happened if alternative life paths were pursued.

1. What if my parents never came to America? I would be in Vietnam. I would be vietnamesejohn500. And I would probably be poor. It’s due to their convictions and desire for a better life, that my family are where they are today. That’s why I’ll forever be grateful to America for providing the opportunities for dreams that Vietnam could not.
2. What if my parents didn’t work hard growing up? I would definitely be lazier today. My parents showcased their love not through the typical American mantra of “I love yous” and family vacations. They demonstrated their commitment to their family through their hard work, working from 7am to midnight everyday essentially doing sweatshop labor. That work ethic was definitely passed onto me and all my siblings, who all work hard in different ways pursuing different professions.
3. What if I didn’t get beat up in the 4th grade? Being beat up by Mexicans at Pyles Elementary certainty taught me fortitude and grit growing up. It also taught me to (mostly) avoid confrontational situations, and the reality of how much race permeates everyday society. I probably identify more as an American than an Asian-American mostly due to being called a “Chino” in elementary school.
4. What if I never became President of the Volunteers of Orange County? After 4th grade, I became deadly shy in the classroom. I imagine I would remain a huge introvert in most settings if I didn’t develop the confidence from speaking to more people. Being president of this club in high school gave me a platform to talk to more people, and eventually become more extroverted in nature.
5. What if I never watched 24? 24 became an essential component of my personality after watching it randomly one day in the FOX television network. I only watched the Season 4 premiere out of sheer loyalty to the FOX television network for bringing me similarly great shows in the past like The O.C. and The Simpsons. But I forever am loyal to the show and hope it eventually returns to conclude its arcs. The inspiration for this year’s theme is of course the television series.
6. What if I joined the military? I very much imagine I’d be a Marine if I joined the military. One of the better branches of the armed forces. And of course I somehow would have ended up probably meeting Katherine and married her if I gone down this route as well.
7. What if I didn’t go to UCSD? I chose computer science as my preferred major at UC Irvine when I got accepted. I imagine no matter what school I would have gone to, I would have had an alternative set of friends, and an alternative set of life adventures. It’s crazy to think how this one decision was such an epic one in the grand scheme of things.
8. What if I didn’t work at Conference Services? In the summer of 2009, I worked at Conference Services. It was there that my roommate (Robert) had his friend Norman sleep in the living room. But without Norman, I would have never been taken to Phil’s BBQ. It’s very likely I would have never tasted those delicious ribs. And so, I am forever thankful to Robert, Norman, and indirectly Conference Services for those opportunities.
9. What if I got accepted into a fraternity? If I had got accepted into Lambda Chi after rushing in the fall of 2009, I would very likely become a frat boy. I would turn into the ultimate bad boy and probably be plagued with STD’s and lots of other adventurous problems. Needless to say, I’m grateful in retrospect for avoiding that cesspool.
10. What if I didn’t join ICRA? Joining the Inter-College Resident’s Association was an essential part of my college experience. If I didn’t do so, I would not have met Bijan, who recommended my eventual volunteering at Anime Expo, where I would meet my eventual wife.
11. What if I had a car? Having a car at UC San Diego would have shaped my entire professional career forever. If I had a car, I would have done the NBC internship in downtown San Diego, and I would very likely be working in a television studio to this day. And so of course….
12. What if I didn’t work at ThinkTogether? Working at a summer camp in the summer of 2011 opened up the possibility of me becoming a teacher in the future. Without those positive interactions with those campers running up and providing me constant gossip, I would very likely not have become a teacher.
13. What if I got accepted into Teach for America? Prior to graduating from UCSD, I applied for Teach for America, which would have placed me in a high need school for a few years to teach the roughest of children. I imagine I very much would have struggled, and depending on if I had any support at the school, I probably would have given up and stopped teaching altogether.
14. What if I stayed in Las Vegas? If I had opted to stay in Las Vegas teaching instead of moving back to California, I would imagine I would be very lonely. I could also see myself eventually adapting. Realistically I imagine my loneliness would turn me into a gambling addict and I would go into debt gambling my teacher salary away. Likewise I would probably be the first Asian star of my 600 lb life after gaining weight eating at all the various Vegas buffets.
15. What if I stayed at Rise Kohyang middle school? Staying at Rise Kohyang middle school would probably mean… with my history credential, that I’d likely still be there today. Not necessarily struggling. But mostly hating the extra work, the professional development, and the sickly way Bright Star Schools took advantage of all us bright young teachers.
16. What if I never volunteered at Anime Expo? Bijan’s proposition to volunteer at Anime Expo almost fell on deaf ears. But I eventually did so. My first year was mostly pointless, but the decision to apply the following year at assistant manager sealed my fate. Due to good interview skills, I was hired (despite not knowing what it was I was supposed to be doing a majority of the time)…. and of course that meant I would eventually meet my wife Katherine.
17. What if I never quit Equitas? Quitting equitas academy #2 in the fall of 2019 was a difficult decision, and yet I did so because of the terrible educational environmental the students and the staff were a part of. But quitting equitas meant that I would be substitute teaching the rest of the year… substitute teaching allowed me to see a gateway into new potential routes and credentials, eventually steering me into getting a special education credential.
18. What if COVID 19 never happened? Covid 19 was terrible for most of the planet. Deaths, lockdowns, and of course divisions only created more conflict in the world instead of bringing us all together. The one thing that Covid brought me was TIME, and that time allowed me to get my special education credential. Without that credential I probably would have never been hired at Dale Junior high. Without that credential I would be out of a job instead of on my path to tenure as we speak. And so, I’m forever grateful for the extra opportunity that year brought.
19. What if I never told Katherine how I felt? If I didn’t tell Katherine how I felt in the summer of 2019, I very much would have lost my opportunity. We’d very likely remain friends, and I would probably be in the friendzone for life, a place I am quite used to being.
20. Finally – what if Katherine said no to my proposal? Of course, it would be the saddest day of my life. Which of course is why I’m forever grateful I already knew the answer before asking (with of course some nervousness and lack of sleep the night before). I am forever grateful to Katherine, and all the friends that came before her in my life for bringing me the love and support I needed to get to where I am today.

In the end, I am forever grateful for making the correct choices in life leading me to where I am today. Needless to say, life remains a series of choices, and I imagine every choice I make in the future will continue to steer me down a rabbit hole of different paths.