How to Buy a Car

After my past tragedies surviving a multitude of car accidents and near deaths, I have acquired numerous amounts of wisdom beyond my years in the purchase of a new car. I used those skills subsequently to help my sister haggle down the cost of her vehicle. Here are some handful tips I learned along the way.

1. NEVER LOOK DESPERATE. The more desperate you are, the more power the car dealer ultimately has. When my 2003 Toyota Corolla died on me halfway to Las Vegas, I was stuck with a decision: be stuck in Barstow overnight and miss the first day of work, OR buy a new “used” car. I settled for the latter, resulting in a purchase with essentially no haggling (and too high of an interest rate). FAIL. Life lesson learned. The car salesman will always “talk to his manager”, a farce meant to drag on the entire process and essentially just waste time to make you more desperate.
2. AIM FOR 0% APR and 0 DOWN. Being a seasoned pro with pretty decent credit, I know the best deal ultimately results in not having to spend any money. With the purchase of my Ford Fiesta, I was forced to put 3K down, but I received 0% APR. That made me happy because I was essentially able to pay my car off with convenience without having to worry about interest. It’s a shame that convenience was defeated by the tragic car accident I had in June.
   
3. DON’T BELIEVE THEIR LIES. The car salesman today literally told five huge lies to us straight to our faces. The fact that APR is non-negotiable. LIE. The fact that it was a “busy day”. LIE. The fact that the car was the only remaining one on the lot. LIE. The fact that their dealership is much better than other ones. LIE. The fact that it was the “final price” (x 5) LIE.
4. DON’T BUY THE MAINTENANCE PACKAGE. When the haggling stops and you reach the finance office, that’s when they start adding “extra packages” to try to get the best out of you when you feel like you’ve won. DON’T FALL FOR THE TRAP. You don’t need an extra alarm system or a maintenance package from the dealership because it will almost always result in a RIPOFF.
   
5. BRING MORE PEOPLE. The more people you have with you, the more you have as a support system to fight against the injustice. If it’s just you alone, the persuasive techniques of the salesman might overcome any pre-existing biases you might have against them. Today with my sister we purchased a new car with SIX people. “Six against one! That’s hardly fair!”